The love month

colores de amor

One would think blogging is such an easy job…guess what? Like other things that are worth it, it isn’t. Although, that won’t stop me from writing.

This particular week has been one hell of a rollercoaster ride for me. As a baker, oh…yes, I bake. Must have slipped my mind. Anyways…I’ve had to deal with orders from people and it’s been exhausting, yet fantastic!

If you keep reading my blog, I will slowly let you in on some amazing things I want to do, places i’d really love to go to and foods I like. Maybe, I might even go all the way into fashion and lots more. Who knows?

So, valentines day is almost upon us and just as we hear people say, “love is in the air”, we are already working ourselves into a fit for our partners.

forma de corazon

Breathe.

Did you get that? Yes, I said breathe. Don’t go breaking the bank trying to please people. It never ends well. First off, be honest enough about your financial status then proceed to make things simple, unique and as memorable as you can. Do not go chasing after fleeting things. They never come back.

Let this love also be extended to family and the less privileged. They are just as deserving as your partner. Having love in it’s truest form is the greatest.

viaje de amor

Let’s not forget to give this love every other day. That’s actually the one that counts. Not the social media surface love, which everyone is hustling to get that hardly ever last.

Take a moment to think about these things…

I hope to write more and share my thoughts with you all. Although, it hasn’t been easy. Oh, before I forget, I would really love to go to Paris someday. I can’t wait for the things i’d share on that journey.

ville de l’amour (City of love)

Someday…

This wallflower can only write and hope it gets out someday. 🌻🌻🌻

Tastes divine🤤

Hard Times? Don’t Think About It

Hard Times

Writing, to most people comes naturally and to some, it’s a hard knock life. The year 2020 already kicked off but, hey! Today is the last day of January. Isn’t that great?Yes, for some people it is and they can’t wait for the new month while for some, if only one more hour could be spared to figure out what their purpose is or how to make that business grow. Well…we can’t all have a fair share of life.

You remember making a list of what to achieve in this month before February but, somewhere along the line, you don’t even know what you are doing anymore. You seem so confused and almost like you have forgotten why you even started. You are already losing money that isn’t there and hard times is already knocking on your door, well, don’t think about it. I may sound crazy but, that’s it.

make your thoughts count.

Don’t beat yourself up yet. Everyday is a gift and that’s why it’s called the present. When you begin to think about your problems, they only materialize into bigger ones and before you know it, you are off the rails and thinking about an exit.

You are doing it right. Keep going.

That you don’t think about it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s gone. No. It just means that you are learning the art of separation and choice. You separate what doesn’t matter in the moment from what matters and choose to take it one at a time. You are choosing to not let it control you.

It may not be as fast as you want it to be but trust me, you are making progress. Change your thought pattern to align yourself on the progressive path. If you keep dwelling on your failures, you will end up hating yourself. And this, is not healthy.

Tomorrow is a new day. Start again.

I will be right here cheering you on!

This sunflower can only, but write and hope it gets out someday.

Chop-chop

Yay! It’s Christmas Time!

I wish you a merry Christmas and an amazing New year.

The year has been quite an eventful one and for some, this might seem a little too late but I think this is actually the perfect time to write this down. Many people already had a perfect picture of what their Christmas would be like but somewhere along the line, it didn’t happen; their Christmas shattered. While for some, it has never really been much of a bother to them. Yet, they get the most merry Christmas.

*laughs* life.

Hey Frosty…😊

My life this year *laughs more* well…I can say that I got a taste of the good, bad and the ugly. The journey into this year, 2019 with so much New Year resolution, one would think obstacles already got defeated. 😂

Sheesh!

This was my service year (NYSC) National Youth Service Corp. It’s something one does after one graduates from school in Nigeria. Through it, I met some really important people who, after it ended are still close friends. I’m thankful for this.

I had plans, you see, just like every other person out there that is ambitious and I was looking forward to a great many achievements this year. You can say that I was pumped and ready to take on this year squarely due to my failed 2018. Hahahhah– If I told you that it was probably one out of everything I had written that actually worked, you wouldn’t believe it. I probably got worse, felt more depression and had more thoughts about suicide this year. But, in the end, I’m the one who would still laugh the loudest while throwing my head back, love the most and still be there.

Maybe I didn’t give my all or maybe I haven’t disciplined myself enough to move through this life undaunted. Maybe it was all of the wrong decisions I made– ahh…yes, it was probably this one. No doubt.

Some people might say, “go sit down! You haven’t been through anything! You haven’t seen anything yet!” Well… It could be true or not. But, have I had a fair share of this life? yes! Did I feel like committing suicide a thousand times? yes! Have I pulled my hair and rolled on the floor crying? yes! Have I given up on a lot? Yes! Do I have lots of unfinished projects that I don’t even know when I will complete them? Yes! The list goes on and on.

This world has never been for the weak, meek and feeble minded. You just gotta toughen up or else…life.

*laughs*

I won’t say that I haven’t been successful even though it isn’t much, it means a lot to me. I got a skill that I’m about turning into a business so, I’m thankful for that.

Friends and family have played quite a big role in my life this year too. At some point I thought I was going to lose some friends but they stuck. While, family…hmmph! We’ll get there.

My Christmas was just exactly how I wanted it. No much crowd and that means no much cooking. The best part of Christmas for me, is the lights. The beautiful colourful lights and yes, I did well to put that up and about the house. It isn’t so extravagant. It was just simple, yet, nice. I feel contented. I don’t have everything but the little I have, I’m full. My mind isn’t in a dark place anymore. I thank God for that.

Be Merry!

Now, a new year is coming, 2020- the pressure is rising up again. The need to achieve everything in a go, to out shine my mates, to secure the bag(money), and get a car. It’s a lot!

What has 2019 taught me? Patience, yes–and to stop giving a f#ck about everything.

The minute you start seeing your life as a competition, you give room for negativity. Take life easy, but smartly. Failure will come and so will success too. Don’t depend so much on the past, it will only slow you down.

I’m not going to tell you to make some crazy new year resolution. That’s shit. Don’t do it. Why? Because, they never get past January. And everyone is back to normal. *laughs*

Another thing I will like to say is this: Never let people make life decisions for you. Trust me, you will regret it. Speaking from experience. But, you will learn and you will pick yourself up and do better.

Go into 2020 as a strong human, who will make right decisions and even when it fails, don’t beat yourself up. Try again. Infact, try everything!

In a few hours we will be in 2020 and I want to say that I’m really grateful to everyone who took out time to visit my page, like and even commented. I love you all so much! Thank you!

Whatever we couldn’t achieve this year, as the sun rises into a new year, we will try again.

I have a book recommendation ” The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F#ck” by Mark Manson

This wallflower can only but, write and hope it gets out someday ❀ ❀

Thank you so much!

The Beginning Of The End

Time of our lives

Life will always be a consistent mystery no matter how far into the the future we would want to be. Some day good, some day bad. Every other day, completely fogged. I for one, can’t say that I’ve completely mastered the art of life so, don’t think me as some stoic philosopher–hahaha….I’m just writing.

You are probably wondering, why “The beginning of the end”, well… I’ve lived on this earth long enough to know that it comes and goes in waves and it always does. Nothing really stays except for what wants to and that includes humans. This is going to be one relatable writing that could spark a moment, an idea, or even induce thoughts that’d shake you to the core.

Hahahaha…it’s still just me writing.

I’m someone who finds it quite hard to let things go and that includes humans and personal belongings. Although, I’ve had quite a lot of changes till date but, there is no doubt that I could still have something from when I was 5 up on till now. Jeez! I hope not.

*giggles* don’t mind me…I’ve given out a lot of stuffs too. So, in the case of humans, let’s just say that I always take my time to accept completely until that trust is broken. Then when it’s time for me to let go, I never look back.

But, I’m not talking about broken trusts and whatnot…I’m talking about the faces we see everyday, our friends, family, well wishers that we’ve never encountered and the ones we are yet to meet in our life journeys.

I’ve just convoked and I must say that every preparation that geared towards my convocation day, left me a little more afraid. Why? Because I knew that the faces I was going to see that day won’t be seen randomly anymore. I couldn’t tell my friends because I was scared that if we discussed about it, it would only widen the gap.

So, I stayed strong and bulldozed through the alumni dinner and then came the D-day. I was screaming internally. I couldn’t believe that I won’t be seeing any of those faces again until a longer time to come or not. >>>sad<<<

Right after the event, I quickly started taking pictures with my friends and every other person I could find. Remember, I was scared. I wanted all the memories I could get of these people, be it happy pictures or shouting or doing something really crazy. I just wanted to take pictures!

In all of that, I still missed taking pictures with some persons too. Bummer!

In that moment of joy, immeasurable happiness and frenzied fear; A light bulb came on and it was like everything was in slo-mo. Then it hit me, “In the end, they were all just faces we had come by in our journey of life”.

All of a sudden, I felt totally free. I wasn’t afraid anymore. In fact, I knew almost immediately that we would all be fine wherever life takes us. The most important thing at that moment was that I got to live and be in that moment thereafter.

I hope I didn’t bore you with all that though–hahahahaha…

Treasure the moments you have with your friends, family etc. Don’t bring in the unnecessary into a moment that should be enjoyed happily. Don’t be a killjoy. If it’s time to celebrate, celebrate and don’t hold back. You might not have the opportunity to be like that with them again because life will definitely take it’s course on everyone. Which would only leave you regretting.

Take lots of pictures too. Hug as much as you can. Yes, I’m a hugger– hahahaha… I love hugging a lot, why? I always have this thing to hug a friend or a colleague because I feel doing that, takes away whatever doubt, tiredness of life and whatnot from them. But, pleaseeee…don’t expect me to hug you at a first meeting *winks*

Write a journal about people you meet on your way up and do the same on your way down. (Few people will get this tho.)

Don’t be in a rush to break away from good moments. Take your time and watch the universe reward you handsomely. *stifles a laugh*

Time for another phase of life and adventure!

Oh…before I forget, go and listen to *Memories* by #Maroon 5. Thank me later.

Now, it’s hotter in here by one Degree! (Unknown)

This wallflower can only but, write and hope it gets out someday ❀ ❀ ❀

Please read up and don’t forget to draw a friend or two while reading. Thanks.

Burning Bridges

To the lost friendships…

Hey, you’d probably get sadder just reading this or maybe more interested and enlightened, whichever comes first. Hehehhe…

So, I’ve heard this phrase “burning bridges”, in songs, Tv and even seen it in books and I never really thought much about it until today. Now, I know you are probably wondering what happened and believe me, I will tell it as concisely as I can.

We live in a world where one too many things happen almost all at once and suddenly it feels like the universe is against you. We go through so many hardships, poverty, success, failures, love, hurt and somewhere in between these things, there is always going to be one particular provocation that changes and questions everything you know.

Most times, we don’t know how far we’ve drifted from people and the world until we are at the edge of the line with no hope of coming back.

When we feel slighted and emotions run high, it may feel good to drastically cut off ties and say there’s no point of going on. However, if you slowed down a bit you just might see a few reasons to keep going on.

This might seem a little off, but friends come and go, yet there is also that friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Now, what happens when that one friend decides to take the high road without informing you?

What happens, when that one friend decides to burn the bridge knowing, you are not ready yet?

What happens, when issues that could have been contained gets out of control?

What happens, when you truly tried to make it work but the other end has permanently given up without any form of reconsideration?

With all of these questions, the story is this: A friendship that hasn’t even bloomed to it’s fullest but with a future so beautiful that even Hades the god of the underworld got nothing on—hehehehehehhe– somehow, has ended in a flash!

Then came the apology stage and the calls, yet no answer. The fact that a status update was able to grab this friend’s attention shows how crazy our world is. Then again came a concrete reason behind the action which was a matter of life and death and of course family trumps it all. Could it have been reconsidered? Of course. Was this friend hellbent on ending it acutely? Sadly, yes. How we respond to stressful situations can hurt us, especially in the future. We may not be able to measure the impact right now, but in the future, we will.

In that moment of confusion, I saw a glimpse of what dreams were truly made of…uncertainties.

I’ve had a fair share of wins and losses this year and I must say, I never saw this one coming. The automotive and whimsy role life plays in our circle unperturbedly will always be a wonder to me.

Do you want to know something? “Always know your place in peoples life so you don’t get too disappointed”.

In the end, there was no fight, rudeness, hurtful words or damage. It was completely silent.

Burned bridges. Only the smoke can be perceived now…

This wallflower can only, but write and hope it gets out someday.

Don’t forget to comment and like🤗🤗

The fault in our stars

I was moved to write a little poem considering all that has happened and still happening in today world. Some of it, I know you can relate and some could be someone you know. I would like us to take a moment to reflect…

You say you love the rain, yet you protect yourself from it.

You say you love the moon and it’s beauty, yet you project evil into it.

You say you love the stars and it’s eupathy, yet you never look up but conceal it.

You say you love the melodies erupting from inside of me, yet you ban me from making it.

You say you love curvaceous thickness, yet you shame it.

You say you love the deep, yet you run from it.

You say you love the ocean and it’s waves, yet you pollute it.

You say you love the unapologetic wild, yet you cage it.

You say you love the colours and it’s magic, yet you detest the melanin in it.

You say you love nature and it’s warmth, yet you bulldoze through it.

You say you love the wind and how it caresses your skin, yet you don’t listen to it.

You say you love love and crave it’s purest intensity, yet you abuse it.

Can you see now, yes?

The fault in our stars…

This wallflower can only but write and hope it gets out someday…

Please don’t forget to leave a comment.🤗🤗

Pandora’s Box! Oh no!

Hey guys! I know I haven’t been here in a while and I apologize for that. Circumstances and what-not has pretty much been taking most of my time.

Anywhoooo… I’m here now.

You are probably thinking, what is “Pandora’s box”? Well… If you are familiar with Greek mythology then, you don’t have to worry. But, if you aren’t then you might want to do a little research on it. So, moving on… Life is not a bed of roses although for some, they seem to get it much easy.

I can’t say that life has been a bed of roses for me. No. People think, “oh, your life is so perfect” or “your skin is so good”. Some even go to the extent of worshipping which is absurd. They forget that I’m just a human who, is also as confused, tired, angry, almost quitting but still grasping unto hope as they are.

My birthday has passed since June and I didn’t celebrate it. I probably won’t celebrate others too, who knows? I could still change my mind when it comes though. I’ve been going through a whole lot for sometime now and I won’t deny the fact that it is slowly changing me. I am in a state of quitting it all and going home and staying till the last.

It’s only time that will tell…

Do you feel like you need to let it all out?

Have you ever had to conceal so much that all you want to do is just let it go?

Have you ever thought of what your actions would do to the people around you when Pandora’s Box eventually opens?

Have you ever felt so dissapointed by people you revere and cant seem to understand the reason behind their actions?

Gosh! Sometimes it feels all too overwhelming?

There…that’s exactly the state I’m in now.

A few weeks ago, I talked to a friend and I said to her “I just need to get a clearer mind and break through the fort of unclarity that is obstructing my progress”.

She said in her own words:

“Alright dear”. “God’s wisdom and spirit of discernment is yours. He says in James 1:5 that if we do not know what to do in a given situation, that we ought to ask God for his wisdom and He would give it to us liberally, without holding back”.

I felt better almost immediately and we ended the chat with her promising to put me in her prayers always.

It’s always amazing to have friends but then again it’s also more magical when they put you in their prayers.

When Pandora in the Greek mythology became too curious about the box that was given to her by Zeus, she eventually opened it and Lo! What did she find? She had let out all the evils and deadly diseases the human race is suffering now. She quickly closed it but then everything evil had escaped; leaving behind the one last thing Zeus had left for her, which is “Hope”.

I’m writing this today to tell you that I haven’t given up hope and you shouldn’t too.

I strongly believe that a breakthrough is coming soon and we shouldn’t be too burdened to miss it.

Be Ready For It!

This wallflower can only but, write and hope it gets out someday… 🤗🤗